Warrior Not Worrier

 Hi family! Long time no speak! I can't believe it's almost March. Time is flying, and I am so grateful that I am feeling okay every day. Today was my 15th round of chemo! Can you believe I only have ONE ROUND LEFT? Chemo has been okay overall. The only rough part is that I have to wear ice packs on my hands and feet during the treatment to lessen my chances of neuropathy. I am glad that science has improved and this understanding exists, but keeping frozen ice packs on your hands and feet for hours hurts. The good thing is that they give me Benadryl before I start the actual chemotherapy treatment (it's supposed to reduce the interaction of some of the other medications they are giving me) and if you have never had IV Benadryl, let me tell you... I recommend 10/10 NO NOTES. The effects are instant, and I can get a good nap in so even though it's painful I can sleep through the worst of it.  At the end of January, Shanté came up to be my chemotherapy nurse. Really, she ...

Hi family! Today I woke up with that song in my head, "Ohhh Ohh! We're halfway there! Ohhh Ohh! Living on a prayer!!!" Let's be honest, that's all the lyrics I know. But today is my eighth treatment of chemo and that means I only have eight more to go. I am actually at my infusion right now and am hoping that my labs are good and I can actually have the treatment.  Okay so as far as an update things have been good. I have had three treatments of the new medicine that is supposed to be easier on my body overall. After the first one (round 5), I started to experience some vertigo but none of the overwhelming fatigue. Then once I completed round 6, I got really sick all kinds of stomach upset- I'll spare you the details. But luckily round 7, which was last week over Christmas was overwhelmingly easy and I am hopeful round 8 will be more of the same. No matter what, I'll get through it.  Yesterday, I went back to Moffitt and met with the plastic surgeon. She w...

Oh my goodness- it's almost been a month since I posted. So much has happened so let's get into it! Round Three left me feeling exhausted. It was the first time that I had several times when I was trying to accomplish something- clean up a room, for example, and I had to physically sit down. That was happening a lot. The first week after treatment, I was moving really slow, not feeling awful- but moving slower and not accomplishing as much. By the week after though I was feeling great! Totally back to myself.  Round Four was interesting because I had a new nurse and from the beginning I could tell she didn't really know what she was doing. She used her hand and massaged my port for a good two minutes prior to inserting the needle and kept asking me if it moved or shifted. I was like, I don't think so? I'm thinking, how would I know? Then, when she inserted the needle, she didn't access the port and then kept moving the needle all around in my skin. OUCH! Anyway,...

Hi family! Well, I'm officially bald. I have never been bald in my life. I was born with a head full of hair so it's interesting to see my head. It's a little pale and I had a dream one night that I had a huge ridge in the middle. Thank goodness there's no ridge. I'm not walking around without a head covering yet. Nor am I in a rush to show it to anyone, but I'm bald and all things considered it's not too bad. I said from the beginning, it's just hair and if what is being done to my hair is any indication of what is being done to my cancer, good riddance! Other symptoms of chemotherapy that I am experiencing, I have black patches on my tongue. I look like a Chow dog except with no hair so not as cute. I also have to pee all the time. Like run to the bathroom pee. It's not cute. None of it's cute, but I'm doing okay. The best symptom I just noticed is the size of the lymph node under my arm. It has gone down so much. It hurt a couple days whic...

 Hi family! Just a few quick updates... I am home from Round 2 of chemotherapy. It was more of the same, except today I moved on up out of my suite and into a private room. With a view! Just kidding about the view part, but I did have a private room. Takers??? It was kind of funny because the window in my room faced a wall and because I was at the Cancer Institute all I could see on the wall was the word, Cancer. Just in case I forgot why I was there. Hahaha! Anyway, back to the updates: #1- My hair is falling out. A lot. Nothing too noticeable I would say for anyone else yet. But I lost so much when I was styling it yesterday that I knew it was time to break out my new wigs. I will definitely cut it this weekend. I wore a wig today for the first time and obviously have a lot to learn, but I'm going to figure it out. I am just grateful that my family and friends got together and purchased them for me so I can try to still feel put together. #2- Genetics appointment says I do not ha...

Well, I'm a week out from my first round of chemo. And, thankfully, I don't have much to report. I definitely felt the worst last Monday, the day of treatment, and have felt consistently better every single day. To most women, I can kind of describe my symptoms as how I felt during my first trimester. I know that's different for everyone, but I felt tired and had low-grade nausea that would sometimes be worse than others.  Medically, there has been little to report. On the day after treatment, at 3:00 I remembered I was supposed to get the shot. Bryson (my future scientist) was fascinated by this device so I told him it should be happening soon and then nothing. So, we forgot about it and then around 3:50-ish it started buzzing and beeping and CLICK! Totally accurate description of it feeling like a rubber band pop. My brother used to pop me with rubber bands all the time when we were kids. So, I guess he was getting me ready for this. Thanks, LeVar! My diet has changed, to...

 Hey everybody! Long time no speak. We can all thank Milton for that. But, all things considered, no complaints. I have been writing this post in my head for days, so I apologize in advance if it's all over the place. I'll try to keep it together.  STORM RECAP- Where do I begin? My sister, Shanté has a bit (and by bit, I mean more than an excessive amount) of hurricane anxiety. Another thing about my sister is she takes very, very good care of me. She shares everything with me. So, she even shared her hurricane anxiety, which I promptly shared with Brandon. We stocked the house, got enough gas to make it to my mom's house, charged our devices, and waited for Milton. He was a loud one. We lost a bit of our fence which we should be able to fix. Our power flickered a few times, but we kept it the whole time. And we lost our wi-fi until Sunday. I am so grateful for minimal issues because we saw so many people with severe damage, I won't complain for a few days without wi-fi...

Now Milton! I'm really sick of you already. This journey is a constant reminder to surrender. The planner (and worrier) in me wants to get everything figured out. If you think I don't have binders, spirals, and spreadsheets- you don't know me at all! But it seems there is another speed bump as soon as one plan is made. It's okay, I can go with the flow. Sunday, I really took it easy. I spent time with Brandon's family and even took a nap!!! I love a nap. Then, yesterday since Milton wants to be annoying and turn into a category 5 (like, your name is Milton- stop!), the kids and I braved Wal-Mart to get a few things. Brandon was very, very against me going and was confident he could find anything we needed after he got off of work. But I felt up to it so we headed out. Don't tell Brandon, because he will never let me live it down- but he was right. I paid later for all the pushing and lifting. My port area hurt from my neck, to my chest, and all the way down my a...

Free at Last! I have been discharged from the hospital and not a moment too soon. The pre-op and post-op nurses were amazing. But once I was admitted that was a different story. The one thing I know for sure is when it's surgery time, I will not be having it at that hospital. No way!  So far, I am feeling great. Minimal pain just a little sore at the incision sites. I didn't know there would be two, but there is a small one right by my collarbone and another moreso on my right breast. They are closed with glue and not too big.  I'm looking forward to the next few days with no appointments. Main priority for Monday is just to schedule my first day of chemo. So crazy but all I keep reminding myself is I can't finish if I don't start so let's do this!!! Talk soon 💛

 Well... That was fun.  I woke up early today to prep for the placement of my port. Jen and the boys were going to drop me off. Brandon was going to work a half day and come and meet me to bring me home. I checked in right at 11, as requested. And then the waiting began. My surgery start time was supposed to be 1 p.m. I waited until noon before I was ever called back and then they prepped me for about an hour and a half. Many people came and introduced themselves and asked the same questions over and over. Just as a sidenote, I was over 12 hours without food and hangry wanted to make an appearance. But I was able to keep it at bay by discussing all the different foods I wanted Brandon to buy me on the way home.  Anyway at 1:45 we were told my doctor was running late. He was completing a double mastectomy nearby. So we waited and finally at 4:30 (!) it was time for me to begin my procedure.  It takes nothing for me to fall asleep so next thing I knew I was in recovery...

Thank you so much everyone for your positivity. It means the world to me.  Tomorrow, I have surgery scheduled to place my port for chemotherapy. The doctor says it is a minor surgery but I will have to be put under for it to be completed. I have no qualms about being put under so I'm not nervous. I think once it's placed, I have to wait a week and then I can start chemotherapy. My start date hasn't been scheduled, but my guess is I'll begin the week of the 14th.  Next week, I have labs to complete, an echo to check my heart, and a PET scan. Then, on the following Tuesday I will have an MRI guided biopsy done on the lump the first MRI found in my breast.  Jen will be leaving on Saturday. I'm sure her family is desperate to have her back. We are so lucky to have had her here with us- cleaning, prepping freezer meals, and just being a listening ear. My cousin Charlene is coming in on Wednesday and she will be here through the procedures for next week. I am so, so grate...

 So... where are we now? I started my appointments last week. Here is who I have seen. 9/23-Nutritionist: Walked me through what I should and should not be eating to prepare for any treatment, to prepare for surgery, and what I will need afterward. It was many things I already knew, but also things I had never thought of. I was glad I took the time to meet with her.  9/24-Geneticist: Before this meeting, I had to fill out a ten-page questionnaire and then when we met she asked me so many questions, mostly about my family history. News flash, I don't know my family history well- especially my dad's side. But the little I do know shows quite a bit of cancer on my dad's side. Which led her to question if my family carries the BRCA gene mutation. If I do carry it, then it would be recommended for me to get a double mastectomy because it makes it much more likely that the cancer would return. I scheduled bloodwork with her for Thursday 9/26. 9/25: No appointments, but Jen cam...

 Two days after my fortieth birthday, I was diagnosed with Stage Three Breast Cancer. So... how did we get here??? August 15th, 2024: I noticed a fairly large lump under my right arm pit. The lump was soft and moveable and didn't cause any pain. I assumed that the lump had something to do with the fact that I was still breastfeeding Braydon, but because I needed to schedule my annual exam, I decided to do that.  August 16th, 2024: I scheduled my annual exam for the following week, August 21st. August 21st, 2024: My best friend, Kendra, met me at my OB's office and took the kids to breakfast while I had my appointment. It took forever. My doctor agreed that it was probably breastfeeding related and did not schedule me for a mammogram as I was still actively breastfeeding. He referred me to have a sonogram and told me that he likes to be aggressive so if the lump was at all questionable, he would send me for a biopsy. Immediately after this appointment, I scheduled my ultraso...